I’ve been going quite crazy lately. Mind you, I’ve always been a bit on the crazy side. Many people that know me would say, really? Jackie crazy? She seems like she’s got it all together. Well, let me tell you, I’m a recovering codependent, perfectionist and I try to look like I have it all together — but no one knows all of the C-R-A-Z-Y things that go on inside of this head of mine — my mind never shuts up — which has a positive side to it, because I come up with a lot of creative and great ideas — but the perfectionist in me says things like: “oh no, there’s a piece of dirt on the floor I better pick it up before someone sees it”, or “the chairs around the kitchen table must be just right”, and the codependent in me says things like: “I must fix things so others don’t hurt”, or “I have to give up myself to help others”, or “I know they need help, but I’m too busy, but they need help and I can’t say no, but I must say no, but I can’t say no…” — OMGosh, I’m driving myself C-R-A-Z-Y just writing what my mind goes through all of the time — SHUTUP!!!! — so you see — inside this head of mine, I’m quite C-R-A-Z-Y!!!! I just don’t verbalize everything that goes on up there. And now, there’s a new kinda C-R-A-Z-Y going on in this brain of mine. You see, in the past I have been able to remember quite a lot, and have been quite bright, if I can say so myself. But lately, I’m like: “what’s going on with me? I think I’m losing my brain or something — AAAGGGHHH!!!”
That’s what this blog is all about…My Brain ‘Frazzled’ on Menopause…..so, here are a few of my happenings….
In the past few months things have really gotten bad…I’ve done things like: getting in my car to go give a carpet cleaning bid, and I go out to the car and get in on the passengers side and sit down. I then tell myself, “Jackie, Ron’s on a job, he’s not going to be getting in the car to drive, so you may want to get in the driver’s seat if you want to go anywhere.” DUH!!!! So, knowing that some of my retired neighbors usually watch what’s goes on outside, I get out of the passengers side, go back inside the house like I forgot “something”, bring “something” back out, open up the passenger’s side to put that “something” in that side, and then walk around to the driver’s side, like all is just fine, and I meant to do that – LOL!!!!
Or how about this one? I pull into the driveway after going on a carpet restretching bid, open the car door, get all of my things out and my hands are full, and I go to the garage to go inside, and forgot to hit the garage door opener to let me get in. Again, DUH!!! Now mind you, we do have a garage screen, so you can’t see the door as easily, but, hey, it’s a daily task that I hit the garage door opener, and why the heck did I forget? Now, not only did I possibly have our retired neighbors watching this, our next door neighbor had sinkhole repairs being done, so there were probably 5-8 men there working, hearing me pull in the drive, opening my door, etc….do you think I felt S-T-U-P-I-D?? I sure did. But, instead of going back to the car, and making a complete fool of myself, to push the garage door opener, I awkwardly, redirected my steps from the garage to the front door, and “acted like I was going to the front door all the time” LOL!!!!
Now this last one is what got me started writing this blog. I scheduled a BLOG training class with our local chamber of commerce, but the day of the training I ended up sick and couldn’t go. So I scheduled a one on one training with the trainer, Carol Sanek, of The Social Butterfly Media Marketing, and I walked into her house, heard her say something about a password to get me online, and saw her laptop and said “Oh my gosh, I forgot my laptop”. I couldn’t believe it. I’m going to a BLOG training and I don’t have my laptop, how stupid is that. I looked at Carol, apologized several times and told her, “I’m so stupid anymore, my brain is ‘frazzled’ on menopause. Seriously, I am doing some of the most stupid things anymore, it’s driving me C-R-A-Z-Y!!!” She was very calming and let me know that it was okay and we could use her laptop for the training. Then she told me that I should write a BLOG on “My Brain is ‘Frazzled’ on Menopause” ….so today, I’m breathing life into this BLOG.
The night before my BLOG training, I really was wondering why I was doing such goofy things, so I got online and looked up information about your brain on menopause, and found this book “The Wisdom of Menopause: Creating Physical and Emotional Health During the Change” by Christiane Northrup, M.D. I ordered it that night, and I got an email notice this week that it’s on it’s way….I can’t wait to get it and read it, but part of what that book stated was: “…There’s much more to this midlife transformation than ‘raging hormones.’…in addition to the hormonal shift that means an end to childbearing, our bodies—and, specifically, our nervous systems—are being, quite literally, rewired. It’s as simple as this: our brains are changing. A woman’s thoughts, her ability to focus, and the amount of fuel going to the intuitive centers in the temporal lobes of her brain all are plugged into, and affected by the circuits being rewired…”
WOW, after reading that, I felt a tad bit better about all my goofy happenings. My brain is being rewired. I’m not going C-R-A-Z-Y — it’s just that My Brain is ‘Frazzled’ on Menopause!!!! 🙂
So if you want to keep up on my ‘F-R-A-Z-Z-L-E-D’ happenings as I post them, and the helpful tips I come across in this next phase of life called “menopause”, please feel free to follow this BLOG and you’ll receive each one I write….and until next time — Happy rewiring 🙂